Olympic memories

On the first or second night of NBC’s coverage of the Beijing Olympics, I was watching one of the diving events. One of the divers just polished off a handstand reverse triple whammy double spin somersault backflip tuck pike dive, and the color analyst proceeded to pick apart every segment of the dive. Those analysts were so critical. To the casual viewer without diving experience, most dives look pretty darn good. I was always surprised that these experts just poured on the criticism. (And it’s not just swimming; the gymnastics analysts did the same thing.)

Anyway, NBC had decided to put a camera on the showers, which were right out there next to the pool. I had always thought a shower was sort of a private thing, but the Beijing Olympic officials and NBC thought otherwise, and filmed many of the divers and swimmers rinsing off after being in the pool. I presumed they were rinsing off the chlorine, having done my fair share of swimming in the past.

As the first diver in the shower was being filmed, there was a long pause of silence from the announcers. Apparently they weren’t ready for this part of the coverage. The main announcer awkwardly asked about the purpose of the showers, and the analyst, in a jolly tone of voice, said something about the divers using them to cool down and have fun. I wish I had that film and verbal exchange on tape, because it was very strange the way it was presented. I didn’t see anything fun about taking a shower in front of millions of television viewers, and almost all of the swimmers and divers looked like they didn’t appreciate having their privacy invaded, except for the exhibitionists among them.

an Olympian in training

While waiting in my car, on a busy street with lots and lots of businesses, I witnessed a most unusual activity. A small boy, not more than 3 years old, was sitting in the driver’s seat of a Ford Windstar van. He would open the door, climb down, push the door shut, open the door, climb in, pull the door shut, then repeat the entire exercise.

This went on for 25 minutes, non-stop, while I was waiting.

At first I was concerned that he was unattended, and would either roll the van back into the busy street, or wander off towards some unknown danger. Then I spotted a woman in the passenger seat, smoking a cigarette and talking on a cellphone, apparently unconcerned about the boy. Maybe he’d done this a million times and she knew that he wasn’t going anywhere, or maybe she didn’t care.

I kept waiting for him to stop, or slow down, or get strapped into his carseat, but that didn’t happen. No telling how long this was going on before I arrived, or how long it went on after I left, but it sure made my uninteresting wait in the car very amusing. I really regretted not carrying my camera, since it has a video feature on it. I could’ve posted this on YouTube and possibly made some bucks from this.

If, in 20 years, this activity becomes an Olympic event, remember that you heard about it here. This kid was in serious training, at a very early age.

2008 Olympic observations

Well, the Olympics in Beijing are a week old, with another week to go. It’s an exciting time for athletes and their families, friends, and fans. For some of us, it’s sort of strange.

Frankly, I don’t understand why beach volleyball, synchronized diving, equestrian events, sailing, cycling BMX, canoeing/kayaking, and shooting are Olympic sports, and I use the word “sports” loosely. Did you know that shooting events in the past consisted of Olympic athletes shooting pigeons?

I don’t get it. Getting your horse to do what YOU want it to do on the course doesn’t really seem very sporty to me. And these riders get all upset when they (the horse, actually) hit an obstacle; how do you think the horse feels, getting whacked in the shin countless times during training? I’d learn how to clear those hurdles fairly fast if I had to take a hit every time I missed. I’d much rather see the riders carrying extra weight, run through the course, and jumping the hurdles themselves; minus the extra weight though, there is the steeplechase in track. Funny, but many people hear “steeplechase” and think horses . . .

Horse sports such as chariot and riding races were once part of the early Olympic games. What’s wrong with a good rodeo? Shouldn’t these horse events just be part of a good rodeo? Give those riders some money, a year’s supply of horse feed, and a new belt buckle and be done with it. Or how about Churchill Downs for some sprints? A Mint Julep, a bucket of oats from Whole Foods, and a hoof pedicure should do it.

Beach volleyball should require just cold drinks, suntan lotion, and skimpy suits. Sailing? more suntan lotion and a good martini at the end of the day. BMX cycling? Back to the X Games on ESPN. Kayaking? Kayaking? Synchronized diving should be a Guinness World Record type of thing; kinda reminds me of cheerleader competitions and ribbon gymnastics, or whatever that’s called.